I am still here.

Never in my life have I had more to share and yet somehow with each attempt to sit down at the computer and share I find that the only thing that I  can do is stare and then I walk away.

So much has been invested by our family in life, ministry, friends, adoption, heartbreak, trying to grasp understanding in so many different situations that leave us with plates that seem to just be spinning.  Will they come crashing down?  Will they spin forever?  Does it matter that we are even trying so very hard to spin them?  I really don’t know. I just don’t know. And you can’t control the plates that other people spin but yet sometimes they come flying into yours and well now you just have broken plates.

And see I’m already confusing you.  Many reasons why right now I should just sit and stare… it does not even seem worth attempting…. I mean I’m talking plates people.  I like white simple plates.  We’ve had them for 12 years and counting.  They go with everything.  I’m sorry if you come to my house and your bored with seeing them. I don’t need to be persuaded that they have been wrong for my look all along and that now there is a new look I need.  I don’t want new plates and I don’t want the ones I have to  get broken.   I don’t have enough money to buy new ones anyway.

 Dave and I just booked a trip in November to go see Frankie.  I miss him.  I need to see him.  I can’t wait for Dave to experience Haiti, the country that has captured my heart.  I can’t wait for him to meet his son.  Our girls are making our life together so much fun.  They bring so much joy to each moment.  Our friends… we are thankful for them.  I am thankful for them.

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