So Dave uses this illustration at camp this summer about how God wants us to dare to jump off the diving board, meet Him in mid air and dare to flip and dive even if we smack! Not to settle for doing pencils. Well when I say “jumping off the diving board” I am not applying any spiritual connotation to those words. I literally mean jumping off the diving board.

At Key Largo a few weeks ago we were at this pool that had a high dive. Dave asked if I wanted to go off of it with him. I said no. Had no interest and didn’t think twice about doing it. Just did not seem like fun to me.

Also while at Key Largo, we went out 7 miles in the ocean to snorkel at some reefs. I stayed up swimming around the boat watching out for Emma since there was a barracuda 3 ft away from us. But I passed on seeing the reefs. Two of them.

The problem I am having is that if you asked me 5 years ago before our life with kids and maybe even back farther into college if I would go off a high dive or snorkel in the ocean, I would never hesitate once. I would do it and love every minute of it. I am just now reflecting about what has happened to the fun and adventurous Kim that I once knew and loved. I know she is in there somewhere I am just trying to find ways to bring her back to life again.

I am disappointed in myself that I have left part of my fun side behind somewhere. Somewhere in the midst of being married, having and raising children and being a mom fun adventurous Kim has gone hiding and I can’t find her.

I just want to never think twice about enjoying life. I don’t ever want to have the opportunity to see some of the most famous reefs on the Atlantic coast and just pass it up because I just did not feel like seeing them. I love the Kim that is in the here and now, I just think she lacks on her sense of adventure. So, farewell pencils… I am about to try and do the one and a half.