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The Subversive Gift of the Move

25 Tuesday Nov 2014

Posted by thedaverhodes in Uncategorized

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Dave, family, Family on Mission, Transition

Post by Dave:

I don’t know anyone who likes moving themselves.

In fact, I believe movers are one of the best inventions of all time.

It’s the word all our friends hope to hear from the moment we tell them we are changing houses. “So are you getting movers?” they ask sheepishly, silently hoping by movers we don’t mean them. Unfortunately, I’ve never been able to help my friends out on this one—every time we’ve moved my friends and I have been our movers. And yes—on many occasions I have returned the favor and been one of their “movers” as well.

The past three years, living in Pawley’s Island, we have moved in and moved out lots of people. And in this season it’s been our turn to move. We haven’t gotten our furniture out yet (please pray for our house to sell), but our family has already taken our most basic essentials and joined our new missional family in Atlanta. And like all moves, we’ve found it’s required adjustment.  We literally are living currently out of our suitcases.

suitcases

Here’s what I’ve found about moving though—moving reveals a lot about what we call normal. It’s when we move our furniture that we find out just how treaded our carpet has been in it’s current pathway and set up. It’s in moving we find out just how much extra stuff has made it’s way between our couch cushions or under our beds. It’s in moving we find out what furniture might not have been working the way it should have been and why. Yes—these are the subtle and subversive gifts of the move we might not discover any other way.

I’m thinking about that today, because even though we haven’t moved out our furniture yet, the less physical staples of our life are in the middle of an adjustment period. As a Family on Mission, we know just how important the predictable patterns and routines of life are. But nothing tries those patterns more than trying to establish those patterns in a different place. And nothing gives us more opportunity to evaluate those patterns than a move.

So here’s where we are—caught between adjustment and normal. Many of the normal patterns we’ve established in the past we think are really healthy. A few of the patterns are not though, so we are trying to learn from our mistakes and make adjustments. We’re not there yet—but at least we know where we are.

In the patterns of health we hope to fully return to, it can be kind of frustrating in this in-between time. Because we know what it means for the family to work and work well, we sense our current brokenness on this level. But it’s the gift of our healthy normal to know just what we need to return to and why. As we all know on every level—“there is one thing worse than being broken, and that is being broken and not knowing it.” So whether it’s in our leadership, our work or our family rhythms the gift of a healthy normal is that it helps us know when we are broken and what to return to.

And yes, there are things that we are adjusting in our normal rhythms and patterns as we enter a new culture, with new people and new surroundings. Like the gift of placing our old furniture in a new house, so being around new people, new cultures and new surroundings help us determine what both our old stuff can do that we had no idea of, and what it’s limitations might be. It’s in learning from new people that we see the places we might have called what is actually unhealthy “normal” and learned to accept it. And it’s in these places that we seek to adjust. The gift of the move is that it not only gives us that opportunity, but it helps us do so.

My hope though is that moving won’t be the only time we do this. My hope is that from time to time we will at least move the furniture around our new house to do two things—first, evaluate whether our normal is healthy and if not adjust it. And second, in places where normal is healthy but we’ve been pulled out of normal—return to it.

Like all leaders and families we will not be fully functional all the time. There will be moments when we break. But the gift of evaluating normal is that at least we will know we are broken and learn from it.

So if you’re moving today, like so many of our friends are, why not take this moment to evaluate and adjust? And if you’re not moving, like many of our other friends, why not at least move the furniture around and evaluate and adjust anyway?

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The Art of Sleeping

19 Saturday Jun 2010

Posted by kimrhodes in Dave, Frankie

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Camp, Dave, Frankie, Sleep

Dave got home yesterday afternoon and he was worn out.  He had a great week up at Wake Forest.  I was able to go up for a day and I must say the students there were so engaged.  It was a great group of students and I’m sure that is contributed to the amazing leaders they have.

It’s hard when Dave comes home and I want to throw him into my single mom world and get some help.  At the same time I know he’s as spent as I am so we both dance the transition days dance.  Frankie has been missing Dave terribly.  Yesterday at 5PM I walked into our room and found this….

Frankie is not one that normally likes to snuggle so this picture says even more about his need for his dad.  The crazy thing is that Frankie went down at 5PM last night and never woke up again till 7AM this morning.  He missed dinner and everything.  I guess he needed some rest too!  I must have worn him out this week!  We’ve got 48 hrs till the we send Dave back out.  Looking forward to some fun family time this weekend.

And.. I can’t wait to catch you up on what I spent my time doing yesterday morning.  It’s exciting and I can’t wait to share more!

Ripple Effects

14 Wednesday Nov 2007

Posted by kimrhodes in mission, Peru

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Dave, mission, Peru

I finally heard from Dave on Monday night.  It was just for a few minutes.  They arrived safely.  It’s not like you can cover a whole lot of info in that short period of time but I was just glad for the quick call.  I can already tell just from a few minutes of talking with him that he is already in the midst of great life perspective.  If there is one thing that we will pass on to our kids it will be that they will have a world perspective of servant-hood.  When they are old enough we will find ways to allow them to experience and understand different cultures.  I say this all the time but if you live in America you are a blessed person.  56 percent of the world’s population lives in extreme poverty. They survive on an income of less than $730 per year or $2 per day. Half of the worlds poor who comprise 28 percent of the world’s population live on $1 or less per day. In comparison, the average American earns from 46 to 92 times more than the poverty stricken comprising over half the world’s population.  I say that to say that when I did talk to Dave he said he visited with a mother and two of her kids.  They lived in a space the size of our Master Bathroom.  All he said was that it has been so good to get perspective again.   Not that we ever loose it but when you live in a life where you don’t face certain challenges or circumstances it’s hard not to be reminded about the realities of so many others in our world.  To much has been given, much is required.  I know that our family will do our best to use what we have been blessed with to make a difference and play daily roles in impacting our world and the people who surround us.  I am so glad that Dave is having this experience.  I can’t wait to see the ripple effects that will play out in our family when he returns.

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  • The Subversive Gift of the Move
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